One thing I’ve learned in the exploration and realization of my sexual identity, and sexual orientation is that Coming Out isn’t just a process that you finish once and then you’re done. Unless you’re Ellen DeGeneres in which case probably everyone who knows about her sexual orientation via her Tv shows that she’s starred in or hosted knows about whom you’re attracted to.
These are some of the responses I’ve gotten over the years in telling someone or people that I’m gay.
1. Oh… well I’m not gay!
That’s good for you. I wasn’t hitting on you but good for you.
2. That’s… good for you.
This is usually followed by an awkward pause from whoever made the response to you.
3. When did you decide to become a lesbian?
Um, it was a Saturday. Yep. A saturday and it was a new moon that signified new beginnings.
4. Cool. Can I watch?
5. “Do you think I can join you and… your girlfriend?” or “Can you join me and my girlfriend?”
6. So like… do you do… *makes scissor motion*
Yes I make arts and crafts but not in the bedroom.
7. Did a guy hurt you?
8. You’ve not had me. Hahaha.
No. And you’ve not had my purple friend either. Haha.
10. Do you date gay men then?
No. Being gay signifies same sex relationships.
11. Do you know Ellen DeGeneres?
Got her on speed dial.
Sometimes Coming Out requires patience, for yourself and to refrain from face palming yourself to the point of leaving marks on your forehead. People may start to question why it looks like someone has hit you in the forehead or eye from face palming so much. But it could be worse. To some people you are the first gay, lesbian, bisexual or trans person that they have met. They may be completely in the dark about sexual orientations other than heterosexuality. Sometimes you have to remember that.
To the very least, coming out is an amusing, disclosure of your identity that will never end. And that’s alright with me. I could live in fear of leaving my door with my partner. I’m glad I will never face that.